Scene from a dark restaurant

The problem is, the Jerrys of the world will always find me. Recently, I dragged a friend to a Meetup. For those of you unfamiliar, Meetups are group get-togethers that are coordinated online but happen in real life. There are Meetups for people who like to bike, to eat, to travel. You name it, and…

Russian doll

It would simply have been a passing thought had I not grabbed it by the tail. But I did. And so here I sit, surrounded by beach towels on the floor of my closet. My intention was good—clean out a closet that escaped my Kondo-like spring purge a few months ago. But now the towels…

Midnight moments off the mapped path

I sat bolt upright in bed, the impact of it hitting me—my youngest son and I have five years together if I’m lucky. Two if Fate is feeling fickle and he goes to a high school that requires boarding. My middle-aged self inhaled deeply, trying to calm the shallow breaths that thought created. For those…

Happy (hardy har har) Birthday

I celebrated my birthday recently. And the Universe made sure to show me, once again, its sense of humor. I awoke that day with plans for treating myself. Not in the way I used to, with lots of friends and loud celebration. I was going to work the first part of the day and then…

Matchmakers United

I have yentas in my posse. That sounds a bit obscene, doesn’t it? Really, it just means I have many people in my circle who want to have a say, offer advice, be heard. So many times, I consider it a blessing. As I’ve begun dating after my divorce, however, it also provides humor (and…

In the quiet

I want a day. A day with no responsibilities. One in which I wake up in a mountain home and walk naked to a clear lake for a bracing swim that invigorates body and soul. Knowing the only eyes upon me are God’s and the eagle flying overhead. I want to see, really see, the…

Catch me

As a young girl, my favorite vacation game involved a swimming pool. My father would stand in the pool; I would crouch on the side. “Catch me!” I’d shout as I jumped into his waiting arms. Again. Again. Again. He never missed. And I knew that. I jumped with the surety of someone who knows…

Vroom vroom

I am not supposed to admit this. It will only lead to disapproving stares, however thinly veiled, at my local grocery or on the school sporting fields. I enjoy an admiring male stare, the rev of an engine as it passes by, an appreciative sideways glance. In my conservative town, an admission such as this…

Two out of three ain’t bad

Except when it is bad. I’m not sure quoting the title of a Meat Loaf Song is an auspicious beginning for a blog anyway but here goes. Three of us. There have been three of us going to the gynecologist together for the past several years. When we can coordinate our annuals. Have you turned…

Flaws, center stage

If you’re going to fall in love with me, don’t fall in love with my Sunday best . . . Fall in love with my body, the way it widens quite a lot around my hips and how I will never have the perfect figure and how I honestly don’t really care. Fall in love…

Guardian of an open heart

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4:23 Oh yeah. I’ve got this one down, baby. Perhaps not in the way this verse was intended. So much so that a couple of wise souls who love me, unbeknownst to each other, have gently nudged me in recent conversations….

A momentary pause

As I watch many of my friends make college visits with their kids this summer, I realize that culturally, we’re missing a beat here. We send our kids off to college to “find themselves”, which for some means growing their hair and writing beat poetry; for others, drinking out of a keg. Regardless of their…