Zimbabwe to Chicago

Cynics, look away. No need to read this post. Perhaps some of my other, more jaded posts will suit you. But this one—no. You will scoff. And I’m in no mood for scoffers. Don’t tell me he is not out there. You can tell me he is in Zimbabwe saving babies, or in Fiji finding…

Are we so very fragile?

My friend called me late at night with the worried tone in her voice she usually gets when contemplating global warming or the potential extinction of the Western Lowland gorilla. But the object of her concern was not global. Instead, it sat just a bedroom away, in tears. Her college-aged daughter was weathering a breakup….

For what it’s worth

My friend and I were out to dinner with my sister on Christmas Eve. My sister had asked about how dating was going after divorce. My friend answered: “Kristine and I are just trying to find men worthy of us.” At the time, I thought it a rather high-handed way to describe what we were…

I am not those other girls

I am not those other girls. You know. The ones that believe every story and think the sun rises and sets on your every word. The ones that don’t quite match you in gray matter. The ones that make your brow furrow and your eyes trail off into the distance as you realize they cannot…

Go ahead. Burn a dinner.

“Man, those days are long gone for me.” So said a friend as I finished telling her of a recent date. As she said it, her mouth tightened and she let out a sigh. “Sad, isn’t it?” Yes, honey. It is. Why is it that women give up the notion of romance at a certain…

Happy (hardy har har) Birthday

I celebrated my birthday recently. And the Universe made sure to show me, once again, its sense of humor. I awoke that day with plans for treating myself. Not in the way I used to, with lots of friends and loud celebration. I was going to work the first part of the day and then…

The art of reduction

It occurred to me when I ordered up a tall blond. I rarely go to Starbucks, preferring my own coffee. But today, my power went out in the early morning. The Starbucks drive-through was my option. As I pulled up to the window after ordering, the woman taking my money laughed. “How tall would you…

Espresso, anyone?

I recently asked two male friends for an honest opinion. “Am I going to scare men–do I scare men away–because I am a strong woman? Am I really that different from the other women you know?” I asked from the heart. I truly wanted to know. Not that I feel I can greatly alter who…

Worth it

When did we decide that we were not worth it? When did we begin to tell ourselves the choices that bring us joy were too expensive/impractical/self-indulgent? I remember, as a young girl, asking for a $20 calendar for my birthday. My mother told me it would be “shameful” to spend $20 on a calendar, that something so…

Just keep swimming

She missed moving water. She missed seeing the stars in the night sky, the others swimming alongside her. She missed the rhythm of her days. It had begun in such promising fashion. She saw the lure, shiny and sparkling in the sun. She took it. And that is when the glass walls around her went…

Gal pals

They get me. That in itself is amazing. They get quirky ‘ole me. And they show up. Not always, not in every way I hope for, but I can be a bit unreasonable that way, truth be told. Girlfriends who show up are worth more than all the tea in China. And that folksy saying…

Cacophony

I’ve been letting those voices get into my head. Not schizophrenic type voices. No worries there. As a therapist friend once told me, “You’re so solid and Midwestern it’s scary. Freak out a little, for God’s sake.” What I’ve been hearing are the voices of the people I interact with in my life. If you’re…