candidkay

Tick tock

I have always felt that I will run out of time. The time it will take to experience all I came here to experience, to do all that I want to do, to have an impact. My mother raised six daughters to “leave the world better” than we found it. Oh, but Mom, you didn’t…

Speak volumes

Our first meeting seemed anything but fortuitous. There I was, a newly minted 24-year-old, proudly sitting in my cubicle on the executive floor of a Big Brand. I was as close to Mahogany Row (what long-time employees called our row of C-suite offices) as you could get without being a corporate attorney or a secretary….

Women, alone

When you become a woman who is alone, you notice other women who are alone. I became such a woman when I got divorced. But each woman alone has her own story, of course. Some women, like one of my sisters, just never marry. For some, it’s a conscious choice. For others, luck or fate…

Scene from a dark restaurant

The problem is, the Jerrys of the world will always find me. Recently, I dragged a friend to a Meetup. For those of you unfamiliar, Meetups are group get-togethers that are coordinated online but happen in real life. There are Meetups for people who like to bike, to eat, to travel. You name it, and…

Russian doll

It would simply have been a passing thought had I not grabbed it by the tail. But I did. And so here I sit, surrounded by beach towels on the floor of my closet. My intention was good—clean out a closet that escaped my Kondo-like spring purge a few months ago. But now the towels…

The escape artist

In a house where you are the youngest of six children, it is not unusual to feel invisible at times. And when the older siblings always seem to have some drama for your parents to attend to, you learn to become a keen observer and an unwilling empath. I can still feel the energy in…

Out of the straightaway, into the curve

I am jarred every time. I can’t get used to it and I don’t think I want to. As I flip through the dating app, swiping left and right as if perusing clothes on a rack, a friend’s ex-husband appears. Oy. Forgive my lack of eloquence. What to say? I still can’t get used to…

#Grateful

True confession: I wrote this last week and this week, struggled to be as #grateful as I was when I wrote this. But that’s life, right? Here we go: Some days I am so damn grateful. This, despite the Cheerios box that sits open on my kitchen island in defiance of my many muttered warnings…

On Notre Dame, and endings

It was a scene distinctly reminiscent of its fictional twin. I watched a group of people sing “Ave Maria” as they watched, teary-eyed, Notre Dame cathedral engulfed in flames. And I couldn’t help but be reminded of the Who’s in Whoville, singing on Christmas morning despite a lack of presents, food for a feast and…

Hurricanes and gentle breezes

My eldest son blew through me like a hurricane for nine long months, intent on getting to his final destination—which was, namely, anywhere outside of my body. Not one to be easily confined, he clued me in early to his preferences. Sick for roughly eight of those nine months, I wondered what had overcome me….

Dancing with Janet

I am in a small, hot room in the middle of winter. Although I look like I’m dressed for aerobics, the (much) older people around me look like they could be heading to the grocery store. Luke Bryan comes through the speaker, telling me what makes me “country.” Thanks, Luke, but I am really not…

Beyond the ordinary

I’ve just deleted my mother from my cell phone contacts list; this is not as drastic as it sounds. She passed away eight years ago. You might ask what took me so long. And you’d have a point. I’ve written before about my mother being a force of nature. She was a mighty oak, someone…

candidkay

On finding magic

Shared dessert

Still waters

A heaping pile of steaming good

A proud patron

Wonder