Jordache jeans, make me a woman. Please.

I did not have “the look.” But I knew I wanted it. The particular look in question was not explicitly spelled out in the early 1980s Jordache jeans commercial that started my frenzy of confusing “want” with “need.” Let’s just say it involved multiple women in some odd tube-top outfits carrying what looked like the…

Get out of my freakin’ way

That means you. Yes, you. And by you, I mean me. I’m talking to myself. Not my whole self, just the whiny, mewling bit that has rigid ideas about its future. What she’s planned. What she’s worked for. What she deserves—with a capital D. I’m betting you have this alter ego also. You know, the…

Why Thanksgiving is a goldmine for family therapists

As many of us in the States prepare to celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday, you’d think we’d rejoice. Not all of us. While some of us are happy to be spending time with our extended families this week, others are stocking up on red wine. And booking therapy sessions in advance of the holiday rush. After…

Eyes wide open, please

I have forgotten so many details of the day but him I remember—Jack Bauer.  He was an eye opener. I’d been sent on behalf of my school to a leadership conference. I was in high school, a freshman—maybe a sophomore. I’d been there long enough for the administration to see this was my niche. Scholarship…

Not born to box

I have a friend whose favorite saying is, “Checked off that box.”  She said this when her son finished his required three years of piano lessons. When the family took the African safari they’d talked about for years. Whenever she sends signed paperwork in at the beginning of each school year. She loves checking the…

Cue handsome rider on white horse

Ok, so maybe his white horse was a BMW. But the effect was somewhat the same. If you follow my blog, you’ve heard me wax poetic about how independent I am. How I was raised to be self-sufficient. How I don’t need a man to complete my life. I did not lie. All true. I…

Give it up

I will never hold a garage, tag or yard sale. Yes, I said never. On this point, I’m clear and sure. And it’s not just because I can’t stand the thought of giving odd strangers the license to paw through my things and case my house. I’m a giver, you see. I have many faults….

Failure’s alter ego

She spoke dismissively of his “failed marriage.” Ugh. Bite your tongue, I told myself. The lecture will fall on deaf ears. It’s a free country. Blah, blah, blah. I still had to count to 20 before I spoke. My problem? I take issue with the term “failed marriage.” Seems to me, any marriage that ends…

Shaddup, shaddup, shaddup

We are a society of motormouths. Yes. Us. And by us, I mean us ugly Americans. There is a reason we got that unattractive nickname overseas. And we continue to display it with alarming regularity. We’re not always dissing another culture, though. Many times, we’re unwittingly dissing the person sitting right next to us. We….

I remember flags waving

A week ago, we celebrated Memorial Day in the States. As the daughter of a man who trained as an Air Force navigator and tail gunner in World War II, this was a big day in our house. I try still to keep the spirit of the day in mind. My memories wandered as I…

And for my next act . . .

I’ve learned to brush off many annoying things in life. Gossip? No problem. Don’t give much thought to people who chat about lives they’re not living. The person who counts out exact change in front of me in line? Infinite patience. Pity me, though, and you will see steam rising from every pore. Pity is…

Cheerios moments

I am missing the small things. If you’ve ever lost a loved one, you soon realize the moments that haunt you, that you would give anything to get back, are the little ones. The Cheerios moments. Mother’s Day falls on my birthday this year. At times like these, I try to celebrate how blessed I…