Quarantine coffee

Hello there, my socially distanced friends. I’m applauding you from afar as you continue to keep to yourselves. Bravo! Keep it up. It’s working. I hope you’re still stocked with your coffee of choice. Not easy to get foodstuffs nowadays. At least not if you, like me, are ordering for delivery instead of going to…

Scenes from a Sunday morning waiting room

I had a morning of solidarity with the little people today. You know the ones. Just under three feet tall, sticky fingers, still mastering large multisyllabic words. And apparently, sick quite often, if the local urgent care center is any indication. I wandered into the waiting room of my local urgent care reluctantly this morning….

The butterfly effect

In college, a friend from a small southern Ohio town often played a country song I can’t get out of my head to this day: “There’s a Tear in My Beer.” And that song has been on my mind this week, as I cry all over the darn house. It’s all good, though, friends. Happy…

To be crystal clear

There I was, on a recent Friday night, sitting cross-legged on the second floor of a very dark, very mysterious mansion. In the lotus position, I was chanting in Sanskrit, thinking—how the hell am I going to explain this one? My friends call my recent experience woo-woo. You’ve been forewarned. A little woo-woo coming your…

Sophie’s Choice in the dermatology office

My dermatologist makes me laugh with the same question whenever I bemoan my weight and aging: “Ass or face? Make a choice, Kristine.” Allow me to explain. The sign above her desk shows two words: “ass” and “face.” When “face” has a smiley face below it, “ass” has a frowney face. And vice versa. Meaning–a…

Hand me a carrot. And by that I mean a carrot cupcake.

I just ate a small coconut ice cream cone. And now my stomach hurts. Which makes me think of a friend. That didn’t quite come out right, did it? Let’s try again. My friend is a nutritionist. She has, for as long as I’ve known her (many decades) eaten like a rabbit. A vegetarian, she…

Finding your inner Italian sports car

It began so uninspiringly, in the dentist’s chair. He had just adjusted a crown for me, as I’d been having some jaw pain. “I think we were just a millimeter or so off on your bite, but that’s enough to cause the pain,” he said. He joked that my then husband was built like a…

Two out of three ain’t bad

Except when it is bad. I’m not sure quoting the title of a Meat Loaf Song is an auspicious beginning for a blog anyway but here goes. Three of us. There have been three of us going to the gynecologist together for the past several years. When we can coordinate our annuals. Have you turned…

A momentary pause

As I watch many of my friends make college visits with their kids this summer, I realize that culturally, we’re missing a beat here. We send our kids off to college to “find themselves”, which for some means growing their hair and writing beat poetry; for others, drinking out of a keg. Regardless of their…

Can I begin at the end?

I was trying very hard not to curse anywhere but in my head. Which was probably a good thing because I don’t think they take well to loudly screamed f*&$*s at my local exercise facility. And quite frankly, given that I am doing pushups on a board, I’m not sure I have the lung capacity…

Brave enough to break

The determination in her face was obvious. “I will bend, but I will not break,” she said. And with that, she burst into tears. As I hugged her, I said, “It’s ok. You can break. In fact, I think you need to.” She looked at me in disbelief. “You never broke. Look at you. You’re…

Show me the green

New Yorkers are crazy. We all know that. But sometimes they’re crazy in a very sane way. Take real estate, for instance. They pay, on average, about 50 cents on the dollar, or roughly $400 per square foot in even a small apartment/condo, for a bit of outdoor space. Let me translate that for you:…