On finding magic

From the time I was a little girl, I have been trying to connect to and inhabit from whence I came.

That sounds odd, doesn’t it? Especially in our forward-looking society where bravery and gusto are celebrated.

I was the girl surrounded by a multitude of people (my large family and the tribes they created) but searching for something in the silence. When I was quite young, that translated to reading quietly wherever I could. I wanted to experience other worlds, especially those far more magical than the one we inhabit.

And there was always a familiarity in the magical bits.

It was as if I remembered a place I used to inhabit, one with laws of physics far exceeding this one.

In my mid-life, I still find myself yearning for that magic.

The times we live in are full of unrest and ugliness. Magic, where are you?

I find little glimpses of it, curated by the most unexpected individuals.

The fairy garden a street over, for instance, which I had walked by so many times without noticing. Until a tiny towheaded gal in rain boots studied it for quite a long time—to the consternation of her mother, who wanted to continue their walk. It sits in front of a house that appears equally as magical, with plum shutters, rocking chairs on the front porch, flowers your grandmother would love. Thanks to our tiny intrepid adventurer, I found myself discovering this garden and staring for a minute or two, to soak in all the detail.

Children, it seems,  have not completely lost touch with the magic they remember from before they were born.

I walk a bit farther and two little ones who speak only through squawking, being at that age, wave to each other from their respective red plastic fire trucks. Their mothers continue to push them around the block, unaware they are hailing each other like long lost friends. As if to say, “You too? This place is not what I expected. But the fire truck helps, right?”

I find magic in the trees, in the flowers, in the woods, in the water. When I lived in the city, I insisted on apartments with a view of water or the park. And I found myself drawn, in between happy hours and baseball games, to the running path winding its way through the closest thing Chicago has to magic—the spots where nature takes precedence over concrete.

If you’re not wired this way, leave it. You don’t have to understand my words. But if you are, you’ll recognize the longing in this post. Be good to yourself. Sip the herbal tea, read the magical books, zen out as you stay totally in the moment while washing the dishes or writing in your journal.

I felt, months ago, as if I must solve the world’s problems. But there are people in place to do that right now. I’m not abdicating my responsibility to my fellow humans. I’ll continue to be honest, to be good, to help where I can. But to marinate constantly in the turmoil—well, it sickens the soul.

There is no shame in needing escape right now. I hope you find it. On a quiet dock on an even quieter lake in the middle of nowhere. In your own backyard. In a few rapt moments in front of a magical fairy garden, seen through the eyes of someone much closer to magic than you’ve strayed.

Consider this my friendly wave from my metaphorical red plastic fire truck, to my fellow sensitive adventurers here on earth. This place is not what I expected. But I’m finding the things that help. Wishing you the same.

 

 

 

51 Comments Add yours

  1. David says:

    I love this post, I think it sums up what a lot of people are feeling. From my own perspective you will find me at some ungodly hour of the morning, when the world is quiet and still, standing on the pier (which is very near me) with my camera in hand waiting to see how the world will birth itself on any given day. I love the solitude before the world fills up and gets loud. I’m finding people difficult to deal with too, to many variations for this country boy to understand. Stay safe and enjoy the new view of the world.

    1. candidkay says:

      Oh wow. That is really beautifully and honestly put, David. I think you are probably a fascinating person. A lot of depth to someone who, before the world wakes up, is waiting with camera in hand to see how it will “birth itself.“

  2. Oh I just love the little fairy gardens!! My youngest daughter and I love anything miniature, it seems. 🙂 I absolutely agree with you, look for the magic that resonates something inside you and keeps you hopeful and happy, especially these days. 🙂 Stay safe! And sending some virtual fairy dust your way. 😉

    1. candidkay says:

      Thanks! I never turn down fairy dust 🧚‍♀️

  3. Roy McCarthy says:

    Kristine, as always you are able to express in words what many of us struggle with. Us lot in the 21c cannot be wired that much differently from our ancestors who believed without doubt that there was another plane of existence above and beyond our day to day toil.

    Only today, our little running group stopped at two roadside fairy trees, untouched by little fingers which can distinguish between real fairies and those which are offered for sale in tourist-type shops. Only today an Irish friend described how her dead father rose as a shadow in front of her, signaling an end to her grieving. The same Irish friend described how her mother won a prize for an essay entitled ‘The Magic Bicycle’ upon which she journeyed to faraway lands.

    We all need a bit of magic in our lives at times of stress. Thanks so much for this great post.

    1. candidkay says:

      Oh, you’ve cheered me as usual, Roy:). A running group at a fairy garden. The visual is good! And your Irish friend sounds fascinating . . . I’m picturing a lot of tales by the fire with something that runs warm to your belly.

  4. Dale says:

    I opened this post days ago and then, I don’t know what happened. So I am back, this time to read it and comment 😉
    I am definitely waving at you from my little fire truck. And while I’m at it, I’ll point any any other fairie gardens I might find, too. Better to share these wonderful things, don’t you think?
    Yes, taking time to escape from this crazy is necessary. If we don’t we’ll be sucked so far down the rabbit hole, we’ll miss the opening when it happens.
    Sending you much love!

    1. candidkay says:

      I picture you racing by in your fire truck, throwing breadcrumbs to the next fairy garden:). Now that’s a good thought!

      1. Dale says:

        That’s actually kinda cool…

  5. G'amma-D says:

    Indeed.You are not alone. We all seek that place where we can run, to escape into our thoughts, prayers and meditations in search for kinder place, if but for a moment. Here lately, mine has been my front porch swing, even in the sweltering heat of the south.
    This scripture is reminder that there is a place to find peace.
    Philippians 4:6-8-
    6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

    1. candidkay says:

      I love that Bible verse. Calming just to read it. And I love thinking of you on your front porch, me on my back deck, and all the others in their special places who are holding good thoughts and keeping the peace.

  6. I hear you sister. I’m in a similar place some mornings and early evenings. That’s when magic is most obvious, I think. And don’t go asking me why. Magic does not need explanation! Hope you and your sons are all well, my friend.

    1. candidkay says:

      As usual, you nailed it. Early morning and later in the evening is when the magic creeps in. I don’t know if it’s the quiet or the fact that so many humans are sleeping vs putting frantic energy out into the world. But it’s nice:). Stay well and keep on keepin’ on, friend.

  7. Karen Lang says:

    Sometimes it’s hard to remember that we were the ones who believed we had outgrown the magic! So silly of us ha! Such a beautiful post and reminder how much we all long for this again. 🙂

    1. candidkay says:

      Here’s to never outgrowing it 💫

  8. Reading this helped. A few weeks ago I lost hours watching the house sparrows build nests . This week it’s been watching the clouds change over the estuary . Tomorrow ? No idea . Thank you for pointing out that it’s ok to step back and avoid the noise .

    1. candidkay says:

      Oh, I get it. I’m an avid reader and find myself only able to read for short chunks of time. My attention wanders to something else. I’m glad you are finding peaceful bits😃

  9. aprilgarner says:

    This is perfectly, exactly how I feel. Thank you for putting that longing for magic into words.

    1. candidkay says:

      I think a lot of us feel this way! Hopefully we get through this to the other side . . .

  10. Love this Kristine, I’m waving a red fire truck right back at you!

    1. candidkay says:

      Makes it a little better to have compadres in the ether, doesn’t it? Wink, wink:).

  11. George says:

    Lemonade…sometimes that’s what your choice comes down to. There is beauty and magic even in these times, if we just stop and breathe. Stay well..:)

    1. candidkay says:

      A good way to put it, George! Extra sugar in mine, please:).

  12. “This place is not what I expected.” Right there with you. Some people feel moved into action at times like this, while others are called to close down a bit and get quiet. And it’s all equally valid. I’ve been in hibernation mode (as much as I can be) for a few years while my entire system goes through whatever evolution/ascension process. I love that fairy garden door!

    1. candidkay says:

      I’ve been surprised at how much hibernating I’ve been doing. I thought I’d be my usual active self and instead, I’m finding people hard to be around in many cases. Good to know I’m not alone:). I know you’ve been having all sorts of physical symptoms–hoping those are subsiding!

      1. Dale says:

        Me too! Miss Social Butterfly is rather content to stay home… What the hell happened to me?

  13. You have inspired me to finally photograph the fairy garden a few doors down from my apartment. As you say, a little bit of magic when we need it most. And often we find that through children, don’t we?

    1. candidkay says:

      Oh, I love that you did it! I’d love to see the pics!

  14. mydangblog says:

    People who can’t see the magic in this world lack a certain amount of imagination:-) Have you seen the movie Eurovision? The magic of the elves…

    1. candidkay says:

      I haven’t seen that movie! I will need to check it out. Thanks for the rec. And I hope you’re staying well.

      1. mydangblog says:

        It’s a wonderfully sweet and funny film–I hope you enjoy it! Hope you’re staying well too!

  15. markbialczak says:

    I am glad to hear you are finding the places you need during this year we’re all having, Kay. The mind and soul need to be nourished for sure.

    1. candidkay says:

      So true! And I’m betting you’ve been taking more walks with your sweet pooch to help counteract it.

  16. It’s like it takes the world going mad to make us all look deeper within and without to the magic that we know has always existed… but we became too distracted with life! So really we can be grateful for this outrageous explosion of nonsense all around the world and yes wave to each other from our fire trucks… love it and imagine visiting these gardens more often.

    If we’re to remain sane it’s the only way forward to reclaim our magnificent and magical selves that you are beautifully unmasking now💃🏼🌈❤️ much love to you christine and here’s to more and more magic coming in💃🏼🕺🥰

    1. candidkay says:

      I really wish it wasn’t taking the world going mad to get us to find the magic! But so be it. Sending that love right back to you and multiplying it. Here’s to the little moments of Magic we all need right now.

      1. I know! and that’s why I’m wondering how bad does it have to get? cause there’s a lot of people still blindfolded! Here’s to magic!

  17. Su Leslie says:

    Waving back at you from my — not fire truck, but homemade cart put together by all the neighbourhood kids in times when childhood meant getting out of mum’s hair and treating the entire neighbourhood as home.

    I totally get what you are saying. My sanity is my little garden and knowing that everyday I can walk around and literally watch things grow (I recommend spinach seeds, boy do they shoot).

    I can’t shake the anxiety and I struggle to trust those in charge, but I do what I can and realise, like you, that taking care of myself and my environment is the first step in being part of the bigger solution

    Kia Kaha Wahine Toa; Kia Kaha.

    1. candidkay says:

      I love knowing that even though you’re thousands of miles away, we’re channeling that same energy. Both watching our gardens grow and tending to them. And what a beautiful phrase: Kia Kaha Wahine Toa. I mean it! Sending you a huge bear hug across the miles.❤️

      1. Su Leslie says:

        Hug gratefully received and reciprocated.
        I love that phrase too.

  18. Big smiles and waves back Kristine. I had several fire trucks and I love magic when I can find it. Nature is my usual go-to, along with books and movies about magic, and kids. All are great reminders of the beauty and magic still left in the world when we look. I understand and agree about the soul-sucking nature of getting caught up in current events. I too am pulling back to focus on me, my blog, and daily life. Hugs and waves!

    1. candidkay says:

      Thank you! It’s enough to make me want to binge on every single Harry Potter book and movie all over again :-).

  19. Judy says:

    I’ve always been captivated by fairy or faerie gardens. Perhaps it’s time I created one myself.

    1. candidkay says:

      That sounds right up your alley! And there is just something about them. No matter how old you are, they just hold a certain tiny magic😀.

  20. Waving profusely dear lady, from a garden becoming understood. Your blinkers are fading kind lady, as you awaken to something that has always been here but until it is time has not truly shown itself. And this is as it should be. As we gain those wisdom’s of life it arms us with that ability to see further and further. Those children who we laughed at their silliness are slowly growing their blinkers, as you are losing yours.
    It is all created to share with us that wisdom, the one and only thing we take back with us to a magical place that our hearts always yearn for, a love slowly understood from each firetruck we have driven to each magical garden we find.
    Your heart is starting to sing for you Kristine, a magical lovers song you have always yearned for…in the past and your future, transcending everything as you get closer to that inner truth.
    As usual dear lady a very magical post coming from that vision in your heart, a gift of the love you have found. May your firetruck always ring its bell and those gardens call your name 😀 ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

    1. candidkay says:

      Thank you, Mark! You were always so lovely in your responses and I truly appreciate it. And you sharing your wisdom. Here’s to some of that magic creeping through the veil :-). I think we all could surely use it right now.

  21. Thank you for the wave, Kristine. It is always good to connect. Trying to solve for the current morass is soul-sucking for sure. Better place your energies into the positive thoughts expressed today. Stay well.

    1. candidkay says:

      Hoping you’re staying well and in good spirits, John! Tough times but we’re tougher.

  22. suemclaren24 says:

    Timing for this post is excellent for me personally. I just finished reading James Patterson’s Suzanne’s Diary for Nicholas. Both the book and your post have put me in a different space, in a space of genuine gratitude. I indulge such feelings by taking photographs of whatever makes me smile. So thank you, for reminding me.

    1. candidkay says:

      I’m so glad timing is right:). Always nice when something resonates. I’ll have to check out the book! And thank you for the kind words.

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